The Opposite of Spoiled

November 17, 2014
Despite a smattering of practical advice, there’s more of the philosophical than the methodological to this primer from New York Times columnist Lieber (coauthor of Taking Time Off) on helping children, especially those in the upper middle class, to approach financial matters with responsibility, generosity, and gratitude. Lieber makes a strong argument that money is something that children notice and talk about. He believes modern American parents’ reticence on the subject bypasses the opportunity to instill both good values and important skills. Lieber advises giving honest responses to children’s questions about family finances and encouraging even affluent kids to take after-school jobs. More specific and fun suggestions include divvying up allowances between Give/Save/Spend jars, establishing the “fun per dollar” test, and making the Tooth Fairy’s arrival less of a cash grab. Assorted motivational stories touch on both the mundane (collecting bottles for deposit) and the dramatic (parents who downsized their home, at their young daughter’s urging, to free up $800,000 for charity). Lieber’s easygoing style will encourage parents to raise a new generation that’s both confident and compassionate. Agent: Christy Fletcher, Fletcher & Company.

December 1, 2014
Talking big bucks with the smallest members of your household will make the world a better place argues New York Times personal finance columnist Lieber (co-author: Taking Time Off, 2003, etc.).Do you know the going rate for a visit from the tooth fairy in your neighborhood? If you have children, you're probably all too aware of the playground rumors that range from $5 up to $50 for the prized first tooth. So what do you put under your child's pillow? Does it matter? Yes, these seemingly small family financial decisions matter a lot, according to Lieber. In his third book, the author addresses affluence, its effect on child-rearing and the lessons most of us are not teaching our children about managing wealth. As practical as the first half of the book is-it's packed with suggestions on everything from allowance to college tuition-Lieber's advice skews toward the upper-class family, leaving out the many families who make less than the $75,000 annual income he acknowledges as his base line. For instance, when he counsels that an appropriate clothing budget be calibrated on Land's End prices, he largely ignores the fact that many families are struggling to afford even a wardrobe from Wal-Mart or Target. Later chapters get into tougher territory, and Lieber makes a good case for using early money management training to help children eventually tackle society's bigger problems, such as homelessness and hunger. Humble stories of kids raising money for Down syndrome research or creating kit bags to give to people living on the street offer inspiration for those who do have money to spend it wisely in the world and to teach their children to do the same. Sound advice on managing family finances but only if you have sufficient finances to manage.

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January 1, 2015
Next to discussions about sex and drugs, talk about money is probably the hardest for parents to have with their children. Lieber, Your Money columnist with the New York Times, answers sticky questions about matters ranging from allowances to student loan debt to deeper concerns about how to know when one's children are too obsessed with money and material things. Delving into behavioral economics, Lieber advises parents to take into account the emotional aspects of money, including the role of social media in churning desires to spend. He also tackles worries about downward mobility and how to prepare children for future prospects that may not be as secure as their parents'. Through stories of families from varied geographical locales and economic classes, Lieber focuses on values and virtues to encourage in children to ensure they will not be spoiled, including generosity, patience, and perseverance. Using those virtues, Lieber guides parents in conveying the value and significance of money and how to use it wisely, how to spend and save, how to give and invest. Parents will appreciate the sound advice and broad perspective Lieber offers on this important subject.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2015, American Library Association.)